I Might Have Poisoned Myself in February

Everything on repeat in my closet, my mind, my ears, and my makeup bag

Mar 11, 2026

January crawls. February sprints. I seem to forget this every year as I slough through the January trenches, begging for the wretched month to be over, only to find myself suddenly in March.

Last month whizzed past in a fervor of snow storms and pink balloons and that little Punxsutawney Phil fellow who’s hell-bent on ruining the vibe every year. What I did on repeat: read, listen, get dressed, and stain my cheeks with a fiery dollop of expired blush each morning. That’s what Feb is for!

I feel Fendi in this upstate warehouse

Took a little roadtrip in February (famously a month of ideal road conditions) and made a pitstop at the Newburgh Vintage Emporium.

I patroned this place only once, but I repeatedly paced down every aisle and through every booth until I got a vintage headache and had to force myself to leave. The only item I left with was this pony hair red leather picture frame — still TBD on what to put inside — but I was tempted by bowls of horses, menstrual cycle posters, and one particularly blinding ski suit.

Then a few weeks later this bag popped up at the Fendi show, and I felt the spirit of Maria Grazia Chiuri descend into my third floor walk-up and give my frame a little kiss.

I had an incredibly vivid dream about her once where I lectured on about everything she was doing wrong at Dior. Perhaps we’re psychically linked. Maria can you hear me?

A swoon-worthy faux fever

Glossier miraculously squeezed winter flush into a $24 tube. This shade of cloud paint gives the illusion of fresh-in-from-the-snow blood-soaked cheeks. It screams “someone must get me a steaming mug of tea, for my health!”

I feel very Victorian when I come in from the cold with a bright red nose, staring at my frozen face in the mirror like Oh this dangerous weather does make me look rather dashing… “Spark” is a much safer means to that end.

And a perfect color match to Banana Yoshimoto’s “Kitchen,“ which I also read this month on loan from Maya Ernest’s library <3

This tube is eight years old and has moved states with me four times. It’s still full. I rediscovered it last winter tucked away and stuck it in my medicine cabinet, then came upon it again this winter and actually started using it. It’s definitely expired, but that’s never stopped me before and it won’t stop me in the future. At least it’s not arsenic.

The C-Word (but not the one you’re thinking of)

I got hooked on Alissa Bennett’s and Lena Dunham’s podcast after hearing Alissa at a Fashion Fiction reading last month. Thank god this woman with the silky voice keeps getting handed a microphone.

It’s a delicious recipe for a show, with Alissa’s dry wit and profoundly empathetic storytelling and Lena’s preternatural ability to condense complex emotion into brilliant one-liners. If you’re the type of person to defend subjects of the Daily Mail’s torturous reporting and dive deep into the nuances of being a female public figure with your friends, you’ll love this shit.

And suddenly I have a Transatlantic accent

This vintage pea coat in pristine condition with a ‘60s midwest department store label (jackpot!!) was waiting for me to adopt her in an antique mall in Helena, Montana. I feel so Old New York wearing it, which is probably a very transplant thing of me to say, but it’s too fabulous to care.

The coat has those gorgeous retro cropped sleeves that work perfectly for a T-Rex like me but aren’t so great at keeping warm in harsh winter weather. Thankfully we had some days of decent sun that allowed me to pull her out a few times.

Gnaturally I loved Lost Lambs

I, along with two million other literary-minded women of New York, read Lost Lambs by Madeline Cash last month. I went in completely blind (my reading preference) and was so delighted that it lived up to the hype. Hilarious, charming, smart without being pretentious — I ate it up and wanted seconds.

I have ~~repeatedly~~ obnoxiously recommended it to all my friends and now I’ll be the fifteenth person to recommend it to you.

“I think my dad’s trying to kill himself.”

“What makes you say that?”

“He was looking up least painful ways to kill yourself on the family computer.”

Last month I prayed for “ONE warm(ish) day and that I have more time to stare at the ceiling.” I mean, sure. It was cold and it was busy but the sun came out occasionally. It always does.

This month I’m hoping that false spring will just be real spring and perhaps this year we’ll be spared from the March seasonal whiplash. Also I’d like to eat a hot dog soon. Feels like it’s time.

I’d love to hear about your latest reads, listens, wears, obsessions, etc. Please indulge me in the comments. Get in touch with me at mackinley@yeehawt.com if you’d like to work together, browse my shelves here, or follow me for more vintage and fashion chatter on IG and TT. Happy March!